Chapter 46
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In front of the study, Olivia hesitated several times.
She was ready for this. She had to tell him at some point.
Theodore was someone she could trust, someone who had been loyal to her to the end. Objectively speaking, he was the first person she should have recruited, not only for the Lutgard family, but also because she needed a trusted confidant.
But she couldn't bring herself to open the door to the study. When she saw her hand trembling slightly on the doorknob, she realized that she wasn't just hesitating, she was afraid.
Was it because she didn't want him and Lutgard to sacrifice themselves? Because she wanted to meet him when she was officially a princess?
If that was the case, she should be sorry, but not afraid. Olivia already knew that Theodore would be willing to cooperate.
She just didn't want to show him the "Laila" side of herself. Because Laila was the kind of person he despised the most.
"Ha."
She let out a long sigh. Steeling herself once more, she turned the doorknob.
"...Via."
The study was lit by candlelight, but it was still quite dark. Theodore stood in front of the bookcase and turned his head to face Olivia. His jet-black hair and black suit seemed to melt into the darkness.
Olivia desperately hoped that her expression was buried in this darkness as well.
Silence swirled like dust for a long moment, and she lowered her eyes to stare at the deep shine of his shoes, only to feel his gaze pierce her face like a nail.
“I’ve never seen you wear makeup before.”
"How did you know?"
They spoke almost simultaneously. It wasn't what either of them wanted to say, but they both felt obligated to say something.
Olivia looked up. Theodore strode nervously over to the sofa and plopped down on it. Standing would have made him look intimidating to Olivia.
"Count Zepelin gave me an invitation, and I'd like to know why."
"......."
"And what are you doing here, running away like that... and becoming Ezekiel Schwaben’s mistress?"
Theodore spat out, chewing on each letter. Olivia's face went white.
No, it wasn't, and Theodore had already guessed it.
Count Zepelin gave him the invitation when he asked if Duke Klaus had an heir. If so, it meant that this salon was much more closely tied to the Duke than just providing Olivia a place to stay, and Olivia was its host.
It would be fair to say that she had become a member of the Klaus faction and tried to seduce Ezekiel Schwaben.
He couldn't believe that Olivia would do such a thing. At the same time, he wondered what the hell he knew about Olivia.
How long had she been Duke Klaus's person? Since his father was alive? Was Klaus spying on Lutgard?
Was what had happened that night between them just 'work' for her? Because the foster daughter status was valid for his father, and it was easier for her to come across as a woman?
Theodore's insides spun with a mixture of speculation and unwillingness to believe. He was astonished at his own foolishness. The hope that it would be different for him, even after witnessing it with his own eyes, still niggled at the back of his mind. He chuckled to himself as he tried to come up with all sorts of reasons and rationalizations.
Olivia's large turquoise eyes watered. But instead of letting the tears fall, she shook her head once and brushed them away.
She could guess what he was misunderstanding, but she didn't bother to correct him. That night…it was just the result of an impulsive mind. That wasn't what mattered. What mattered was to survive, to win.
She approached the desk with quick steps. Theodore's gaze followed her, still. She opened a locked desk drawer, pulled out a large, sealed envelope, and held it out to him.
"I want you to look at this."
"......."
Theodore took the envelope without a word. The candlelight glistened in Olivia's dark hair, and her sweet scent drifted into his lungs. She was beautiful, but a different appearance, a different scent than the woman he loved.
He tore open the envelope. He had expected to find a message from Duke Klaus, but the envelope inside was familiar.
It was his father's letter, the one that had come with the will. Theodore had received a letter in the same envelope, so he knew it well.
Olivia hadn't opened it. It was still intact, right down to the beeswax seal on top of the glue.
Olivia handed him a letter knife. He broke the wax seal, opened the envelope with the knife, and read the letter inside.
His gaze paused for a moment as he scanned it.
Olivia had read the letter so many times in her past life that she could guess where he stopped. It was probably telling him who she was.
His gaze wavered, touching Olivia briefly before returning to the letter.
The story in the letter was not a short one. It detailed how the young maid Gisela had met Pavel Lutgard on the day of the Empress's assassination, when she had fled alone with the baby princess in her arms, how Pavel had hidden her and taken her to Lutgard Castle, and how he had falsified her identity to hide her.
Theodore recalled the words of the letter he had received from his father.
[I am still bound by my oath. How I wish I could have told you all of this!
But please believe me.
I have never betrayed your mother. As a knight, I took an oath to protect Lady Ferrill, and Olivia was a child I had to protect.]
He didn't believe his father. No one would have believed him.
Why else would his father care so deeply for a woman whose identity was unknown, if not because he loved her. Even when he died, he didn't explain. Everyone assumed it was because there was no room for explanation.
But if this was true, his father had honored his vow to the end, even in disgrace.
And Olivia....
He stared at Olivia, his mind turning white, his face expressionless.
Theodore choked and fiddled with his tie, but he couldn't pull it off. He couldn't deny the letter. There was no reason to suspect it was a forgery, and everything about it, from the handwriting to the seal, was unmistakably his father’s.
If this was all true, it was disrespectful even to stand face to face with Olivia like this.
"Did you... know the contents of this letter?"
He asked, his voice cracking. No, he didn’t even need to ask. If she didn't know, she wouldn't have any reason to hand it to him now.
Nevertheless, it took great courage to spit out the words.
"Your Highness."
That night, she must have already known who she was.
She reached out her hand to him, asked him if she could kiss him, and fell into his arms... knowing it.
But from the moment he read this letter, none of that mattered. No matter what he thought of her, no matter how badly he wanted her, no matter what he felt, there was only one thing he could do.
He slowly dropped to one knee, his right hand resting on his left chest.
"Please forgive my rudeness up until now."
Olivia shuddered in horror.
She knew Theodore would do this. He had in her last life, too, treating her as a princess from the moment he read the letter and learned who she was.
But she wanted to be just Olivia to him, and had wished it all along.
That was why she ran away without telling him. She had many reasons for doing so: she didn't want to involve Lutgard, she needed to avoid Schwaben, but no matter what excuse she used, that was the most important one.
She coveted his heart, which she had only glimpsed at the very end. She wanted to embrace him, even though she thought it was not the time to waste her energy on such things. Even though she knew she had no time to waste, she wanted to be greedy for just one day.
She swallowed her tears with great difficulty.
She had to accept this loyalty. She was the princess.
She would be the one to protect him, not a helpless woman clinging to him and hoping for salvation. Feelings didn't matter.
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