Chapter 105
***
Blair glanced sideways at Benjamin as he packed his medical bag, then quietly composed herself.
“Of course. Please come in.”
Click. Edmund flung open the bedroom door and strode in. Benjamin, who had just finished getting ready to leave, hid his bewilderment as if nothing had happened and smiled at him.
“I was just about to head out after finishing my rounds, so you’ve arrived at the perfect time.”
“……”
“It’s still too early to draw any definitive conclusions. Would you like to hear a brief assessment, though?”
“Later. I think it would be better to speak with my wife first.”
Edmund replied curtly, not even glancing at the doctor, and walked over to Blair, who was sitting on the sofa, reaching out his hand. His knuckles protruding, he gently brushed her forehead as if checking for a fever.
Feeling that familiar body heat, Blair cautiously looked up at Edmund. His face looked the same as always, but his complexion was slightly sallow. Had something happened?
“I’ll pass on the doctor’s opinion that things will become clearer after an examination in about two weeks. Well then, Duchess. I’ll be taking my leave now.”
Sensing the strange atmosphere, Benjamin hurriedly spoke and stepped out of the bedroom. A silence hung in the air as the two were finally left alone. Despite the awkward silence, neither of them dared to speak first.
Blair studied Edmund’s face intently but, as expected, failed to read his thoughts. She wanted to ask if he was all right, but the words wouldn’t come out. She could only guess that something unpleasant had happened. It was because the shadow flickering across his calm face felt slightly unfamiliar.
The gaze that had been silently fixed on her suddenly softened into a faint smile.
“How did it feel?”
Edmund continued in a slightly hoarse voice.
“When you said you might not be pregnant.”
“…I don’t know.”
As Blair quietly lowered her gaze, the hand holding her chin tightened, lifting her face. The man, meeting her eyes again, smiled more clearly. It was by no means a smile born of joy.
“It’s okay. Tell me.”
“I…”
Was it really okay to be honest?
“I thought it was a relief. I don’t think I’m ready yet.”
In an instant, the forced smile vanished from Edmund’s face. Blair added a cautious excuse.
“This wasn’t something we planned.”
When they’d agreed to the sham marriage, the two of them naturally hadn’t considered pregnancy. Of course, even when they were in love, they’d never thoroughly planned for a pregnancy. The “we” Blair was referring to was the latter. However, the man standing before her seemed to have interpreted it slightly differently.
“Didn’t you say you thought of it as the fruit of love?”
“…Of course, I do think that.”
“Ah. So now that it’s actually happened, it doesn’t feel like love?”
A twisted smile slipped from his lips.
“How unfortunate. To have thrown yourself into my arms so many times without even being sure if it was love.”
“…Edmund.”
“I said that with your best interests in mind. If you’d thrown yourself into my arms with such uncertainty, it would have been quite a burden.”
“A child is a being for whom parents must take responsibility for the rest of their lives. How difficult would it be if one were to appear unexpectedly, without any planning?”
Blair made a conscious effort to soften the tone of her voice.
“And I thought you, more than anyone, would be the most uncomfortable with things straying from the plan…”
“Because the circumstances have changed.”
Edmund’s tone was firm as he cut her off abruptly. Blair, who had been looking up at him with her brows slightly furrowed, finally let out a sigh.
The conversation kept going in circles. She couldn’t tell if the “circumstances” he referred to stemmed from the changes brought about by the will, or if he was referring to the original circumstances—when he hadn’t expected to fall so deeply in love with her. Blair couldn’t be sure of anything. Not even the love he had promised her.
“Benjamin says I’ll have to get a checkup later to get an accurate result, but anyway… you should take it easy from now on.”
“…Exercise restraint.”
Edmund let out a wry chuckle and lowered the hand that had been cupping Blair’s cheek. He wrapped his large palm around her slender neck, tickling her earlobe, then slid his hand beneath her fabric to caress her bare shoulder. The sensation of his touch, so close yet just out of reach, made her breath falter for a moment. Judging from their past encounters, this was the prelude to making love.
“Are you telling me to hold back even if I want to hold you?”
“That’s not what I meant…”
His hand, which had been resting on her shoulder, naturally slid down her chest and cupped her breast. As her body, accustomed to pleasure, reacted involuntarily, a shiver ran down Blair’s spine.
“This isn’t the time to be talking about that.”
She hurriedly grabbed his wrist.
“Ed, what’s wrong?”
“……”
“Did something happen?”
Edmund remained silent for a moment, his wrist still held fast. The man, whose broad chest had risen and fallen, finally spoke.
“I need you, Blair.”
His voice was strangely desperate, as if a breath he’d been holding for a long time had suddenly burst out.
“I need you so desperately now that I can hardly imagine a life without you by my side. I no longer have the option of letting you go.”
Blair’s heart was pounding rapidly. An emotion that couldn’t be explained by love alone flickered across his face. It was a desperation as if his throat were being squeezed, clinging to his last thread of life.
But she couldn’t say a word. His confession brought both ecstasy and fear at once, leaving her unable to reach out to either.
Nevertheless, she found herself wanting to embrace the man who was crumbling. Because that was the love she knew.
Blair rose from the sofa and cupped Edmund’s face with both hands. In an instant, their lips met and their breaths became entangled. It was impossible to tell whose tears were streaming down their cheeks as they pressed against one another.
***
That night, while the Duke and Duchess slept a particularly deep sleep, a silent commotion was unfolding at the duke’s mansion.
Isabelle walked silently down the dimly lit hallway, with Rufus following quietly behind her. Their footsteps were heading toward the mansion’s back gate.
When they finally reached the back gate, a guard who had been pacing restlessly back and forth sensed their presence and flinched.
“I thought you were running late. I was getting anxious because it was almost my shift change… Thank God.”
The guard whispered to Isabelle with relief. Sam, a guard who had served the Liberte family for two generations, had long been under Isabelle’s care.
“I will never forget your hard work. Did you bring it?”
“It’s right here.”
Isabelle wrapped herself in one of the pitch-black cloaks Sam handed her, then personally draped the other one over Rufus. Rufus, who was slight of build, was only slightly taller than Isabelle, so it was difficult to recognize him beneath his deeply pulled-down hat.
“You didn’t get caught by anyone, did you?”
“No, but I did raise a bit of suspicion by suddenly requesting a shift change for the night shift. I don’t know when word might reach His Grace the Duke… no, the young master.”
His effort to please Isabelle was evident, even in his deliberate choice to refer to Edmund as the “young master.”
“Don’t worry about it. All we have to do is get out of Eldenvale safely tonight.”
“The carriage is waiting outside. My uncle will escort you to Borsa.”
Sam added hesitantly.
“Um… if the young master finds out, I won’t be able to work at the Duke’s residence anymore. So, regarding the reward you promised, please…”
“Hey! We’re in a desperate situation right now—is this really the time to be talking about payment?”
Rufus, who had been listening quietly, raised his voice impatiently. Startled, Isabelle tried to restrain her son, then gave the guard a firm nod.
“I will definitely pay you. Trust me.”
“…Yes.”
The back door, its hinges well-oiled, opened silently. Rufus slipped out first, but as Isabelle was about to follow, she suddenly stopped and cast her gaze upward—as if staring straight at Edmund’s bedroom on the second floor. As if to say she would never yield to his will.
“Mother! What are you doing? We’ll be late!”
Rufus, who had been walking a few steps ahead, turned around and called out to Isabelle. Her eyes, which had been so stern, softened as she turned to her son, becoming more gentle than ever before.
“Let’s go now.”
My son. My precious child, whom I could never send away. No matter the cost, this mother will protect you.
***
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