TPOP 136

Chapter 136

***

Felix, who had been leaning forward toward Diana, slowly straightened his back. Diana’s head followed his line of sight and lifted upward.

A chilling wind blew through the eyes of the man she was looking up at. She felt a chill run down her spine, as if she were facing a beast as big as a house.

“Diana, that’s not how you give an order.”

His voice, devoid of any inflection, squeezed the life out of her.

This time, no matter how steeled her resolve, she couldn’t help but hesitate.

“An order is something only someone with nothing to lose can give to someone with everything to lose. So, when you’re giving orders, you have to be more careful than you think. You have to clearly understand not only your opponent but also your own position. For example...”

Felix nodded toward the area beyond her shoulder. Her heart skipped a beat. The city, bathed in the setting sun, spread out behind her.

Red storm clouds were sweeping across the capital of a kingdom that had once been beautiful and peaceful. All across Mepen, the roaring tiger flags, soaring as if to pierce the sky, stood stiffer than ever.

The man standing tall between demons and humans looked down at her with an emotionless face.

“Whether you can take responsibility for the words you just spoke, or not. Whether you’re even in a position to do so, and so on.”

“What are you talking about…?”

“Would you still say the same if I burned all of them to the ground? Diana.”

As if waiting for this very moment, a piercing scream echoed from somewhere in the city.

The man, glancing over at the city, didn’t even pretend to be surprised. Felix snorted derisively, as if he’d expected this, and asked with a glance.

“Does it really not matter what I do? Really?”

Diana’s fingers began to tremble slightly. What was happening in Mepen? Or perhaps in Kairam?

No. Perhaps it was a ploy to unsettle her. Or simply an attempt to scare her. Whatever it was, she must not show weakness until she was certain. The moment she showed a weakness, the black panther would pounce and tear into her neck.

She must not be swayed. Diana cleared her parched throat.

“Do whatever you want. Whether you burn Mepen to the ground, or whether I leave you forever—it’s all up to you.”

Seeing that Diana didn’t flinch in the slightest, Felix raised one eyebrow. It seemed to be a reaction he hadn’t anticipated at all. Felix muttered quietly.

“Why have you become so fearless, Diana?”

There was only one reason Diana could provoke him this strongly. It was because it was now clear which of them was the stronger and which was the weaker. She sneered inwardly.

Why wasn’t she afraid? Well, that’s because he—

“Because I love you?”

But Felix was quicker.

Diana stared at the man, feeling dazed. It was as if she’d been hit over the head.

“What did you just say....”

The deep blue eyes looking down at her didn’t waver in the slightest. As if stating a simple fact, as if he had not the slightest doubt about the words he had just spoken.

Diana burst into a laugh that sounded like a sob. The feeling of having a vague suspicion confirmed by the man’s voice was, indescribably… devastating.

Diana asked back, her mind in a daze.

“Do you even know what that feeling is?”

“And if I did?”

“That’s impossible.”

“I’m not in the mood for wordplay...”

Felix fell silent and roughly ran his hand through his hair. Diana stared blankly at the man who was managing to suppress his temper and remain patient.

“Love, love...”

Though his eyes clearly revealed those of a man deeply in love, he himself was not the type to comprehend the emotion of “love.”

He had neither the will nor the effort to “understand” it. What he perceived was merely a “phenomenon.”

Could that truly mean the same thing as the love she knew? Probably not. The love Diana had received up until now consisted of her mother’s tender whispers, her father’s broad embrace, her spirit friends who always provided her with a sanctuary, and the power of the Balestega that never betrayed her expectations. They cherished her, always stood by her side, and while acting as steadfast allies when needed, they also respected her choices.

And so she learned to call that feeling—the one that made her feel truly alive—love.

Not a state of being consumed by a desperate longing to possess the other person.

“Let’s go back.”

Felix held out his hand to Diana. It was his twisted right hand.

“Come on, Diana. I need you.”

For a moment, Diana couldn’t take her eyes off his hand.

It was undoubtedly the same hand that had caressed her body so freely last year, the one that had held a brush and charcoal to draw intricate lines on the canvas.

Undoubtedly, that hand had been as beautiful as his face. The misaligned bones seemed unlikely to ever return to their original form, and the same was true for this twisted relationship.

So, is this what your love looks like? Diana wanted to ask him.

Is this what you call love—so cruel, so ruthless, so selfish?

If so, this is where we’ll inevitably be blocked. We’ll end up running along eternal parallel lines, never to converge on the same path. Even though she hadn’t really expected anything, her chest felt tight and constricted.

“If I won’t come on my own, you’ll drag me here. Even if it means burning all of Mepen to ashes?”

“Don’t you think it would be wiser to just come here willingly before I do that? If you’d hoped I’d be even a little rational, you shouldn’t have jumped in front of me on your own two feet.”

Felix’s voice gradually cracked. Like a massive rock being subtly eroded by wind and rain, the end of his words split, and suppressed emotion seeped through.

“Diana. I thought you were dead. Even though I knew in my head that you weren’t, it was a terrible feeling.”

“…”

“So there won’t be a second time. Never again.”

Ah, I see. Diana let out a dry, hollow laugh. Because she jumped off a cliff right in front of him. The reason he searched for her like a madman, the reason he couldn’t confirm whether she was alive or dead was because he couldn’t find her body... She couldn’t know—nor did she want to know—what emotional changes that incident had caused in him or how he had changed as a result.

All she could do was let out a hollow laugh. Something like stomach acid churned in the back of her throat.

It was a memory she’d buried, pretending not to know, because she was afraid to face it. There was something she’d acquired without realizing it, and then lost without realizing it had gone. Diana remembered every single one of the ways that man had behaved back then.

"...you felt terrible because you thought I was dead."

It was so ridiculous she wanted to scream. That memory, which she had truly wanted to keep buried, finally rose up and choked her.

"So, did it not matter if the child died?"

***

Near the border between Ormance and Dortes. Queen Ianna was receiving a report on intelligence gathered by Ormance’s spies.

“So, are you certain that Elliot made it safely into the royal palace?”

“Yes, Your Majesty. I saw Lady Diana rescue His Royal Highness the Crown Prince with her own hands.”

“I see...”

Ianna let out a sigh of relief.

Though she acted like a heartless mother, she worried about her youngest son day and night. Since sending him to a land that had fallen into imperial colonial rule, she hadn’t slept soundly a single day. In addition to the knights sent to escort Elliot, she had stationed spies throughout the small towns of Dortes to gather news quickly. Upon hearing that the royal castle in the capital, Mepen, had been transformed into a natural fortress, she had personally made her way here.

However, the checkpoint at Kairam was already firmly closed. The Empire had made it clear that from now on, no one would be allowed to enter or leave the heart of Dortes. Despite a flood of passage requests from numerous nations, the Karman Command remained unmoved.

“Have you ascertained the true nature of the riot that occurred in Kairam?”

“Yes, Your Majesty. It is reported that a group of immigrants in Kairam attacked knights belonging to the Imperial Command. Since most of them are said to be from Grenia and Lelon, there is a high probability they are spies acting on orders from their home countries. It appears the Kingdom of Grenia and the Kingdom of Lelon have decided to challenge the Empire.”

“It’s only to be expected. With the Emperor of Karman’s whereabouts unknown, it has been revived.”

The Emperor’s whereabouts. The common people, who have never seen the Emperor, believe the portrait of Emperor Karman circulating in the world to be genuine, but those who know the Emperor’s face have long harbored doubts. Elliot, too, had once expressed his doubts.

“This portrait differs quite a bit from the Emperor’s true face, Your Majesty. Well, if you insist it’s the same person, I suppose I could accept it...”

What if the figure in the portrait wasn’t the Emperor? If someone who wasn’t the Emperor was parading through the streets claiming to be him, where was the real Emperor, and what was he doing?

Ianna looked down at the documents before her and gathered her thoughts. Of course, at this point, the Emperor’s exact whereabouts weren’t particularly important. What was noteworthy was that something was happening within the Karman Imperial Family—and the possibility that a vacuum had been created in the throne of the empire.

In such a situation, those who wouldn’t miss the opportunity to exploit that opening were bound to appear. That was the nature of power. The moment you let your guard down, it would be all too easy to have it snatched away.